We all need a little help in this area, let’s be honest. Don’t worry. I’ve got your back.
Step 1: Feel sorry for yourself. A little bit of self-pity goes a long way. This is an important first step, because it makes all the later steps easier to justify. If you feel like your life is unfair, that you’ve been handed too much work, that you should have been given an extension on that assignment – wallow in that feeling.
Step 2: Make a list of all the things you should be doing. Bonus points for several colours of pens, glitter, and anything 3-dimensional incorporated into your list.
Step 3: Gather all the things you need to do into one accessible place. Organise them – by difficulty, alphabetically, historically, whatever.
Step 4: Take a snack break.
Step 5: Tell everyone you can contact, by any means, that you have to stop talking with them to work. Start conversations just so you can end them. Make sure to thoroughly ‘end’ every conversation with well-wishing and emoticons.
[Spot check! Still feeling a healthy level of self-pity? If not, make sure to exaggerate how heavy your workload is to the friends you’re chatting to, and how little it’s your fault! That should do the trick :)]
Step 6: Take another snack break. Actually, make it a full meal. All that talk about working? Man, you’ve earned it.
Step 7: Collect your thoughts once more. Re-read the fun list you made earlier. Add some items to the list that you’ve already done and check those off.
Step 8: Update social media. Instagram a sad-faced you buried in books. Post a whiny Facebook status. Whatever works for you.
Step 9: While social networking, get distracted by something one of your friend’s posted, and follow a long trail of internet crap, like a baby groping for Cheerios on the kitchen floor. Be sure to check any facts on Wikipedia and Tweet about all your findings. Take a few quizzes while you’re in the zone. Why not find out which Gilmore Girls character you are?
Step 10: Blog.
Step 11: Maaaayyyybe start working. Open a Word document. Write the date at the top of the page in your notebook. Count how many pages of reading you should do, then subtract how many of those pages are title pages, references, footnotes, etc.
Step 12: Take a nap when you realise how much you actually have to do.
Step 13: Wake up and repeat.
You’re welcome.
janellethinks 